Ten obviously obvious questions that people ask

This is original work of the blogger.

I am sure all of us have been asked at least half of these questions.

1. Are you mad?

Really, what do people expect you to say to that! Yes, I am. Its congenital. Or No, I am not but it seems like you are.

2. Have you lost it?

Not the last time that I checked. Let me check again. Oh and by the by, which 'it'?

3. Am I looking fat?

Are you blind? See for yourself. If I say yes, you are going to have something to say about it and if I say no, you are going to have something to say about it anyway.

4. Are you angry?

No my face is like that because I ate something disagreeable! Have you done anything that should make me angry? If yes, then I am. If no, think again!

5. Did I wake you up?

No I talk in my sleep. Go on.

6. Are you listening?

If you have to ask me that, what do you think?

7. How could you do that to me?

You actually want me to tell you the detailed process? Really? Why don't I just do it again and show you?

8. How dumb is that?

For all intents and purposes I can't measure dumbness! And you don't really want me to tell you "How" dumb is that.

9. You know what happened.... ?

No I don't. And you sure as hell are going to tell me, even if I do. So go on.

10. Are you hurt? / Is it paining ?

It is bleeding. What do you think?