An interesting conversation

Namrata - We can rarely see things from the point of view of another person because we look at the facts through the screen of an impression or an interest which distorts our view; and then there are accusations, quarrels and MISUNDERSTANDINGS.

Yashada -
We quarrel because there are accusations
there are accusations because there are misunderstandings
there are misunderstandings because of difference of point of view,
There is difference of point of view because we have an opinion,
We have an opinion because we have an independent mind......

So to avoid the quarrels shall we give up an independent mind? Hell no!

As much as it pains us, drains us and hurts us to quarrel, if the cause is just we must quarrel other wise we will be unjust to our independent mind...and once we start telling our mind to shut the hell up and take the easy way out we are going to keep doing it, get into that habit and stifle the independent mind that we have developed over years!

Really, is it worth it?

Gaurav - an independent mind negates the need of the logic of being rational and makes one's thinking prejudiced. all it is meant to say is, be independent, but also rational. think of the implications it has on others and then work out a logic that could avoid confrontations due to misunderstandings. now, that is one hell of an ideal "independent" mind... See More! :)

You saying the quarrel is justified if the cause is valid. but then who decides if the cause is valid from the universal point of view? it is again a jaundiced view of what you think is correct. so, it is the need of the hour to be rational and impassionate while also being logical and working out solutions to avoid stand-offs.

Do not stifle the independent mind that is so painstakingly developed over the years. But it is also necessary to be generous and considerate at times. So, eventually, your independent mind has to make a selective choice. standing up for what is right, or standing down in the impeding risk of losing out a friend.

Yashada - Gaurav you are awesome!

And I do agree, you have to sometimes calculate the trade off and then decide....whether quarreling ( I won't call it quarreling, its simply taking a stand and standing by it) is more important than your peace of mind, or your peace of mind is important :)

But if we keep on about thinking about someone else's feelings, most of the times we forget to think about our own feelings and hurt ourselves all the more in the process.

P.S - Sorry, Nammu! But it was such an interesting conversation, it had to be kept somewhere from keepsakes. Hope you don't mind!